The Vanishing (1993): this wasn't the vanishing that i wanted. hollywood didn't have the original, so i opted for the latter version. funny how sandra bullock doesn't get top billing like the others. sandra was so perfect as a young actress. sad what she turned into. bridges plays the craziest character, sometimes reminiscent of ted bundy. lots of details and i don't know what to call it but maybe false foreshadowing. the whole premise of the story is something that most probably can't even imagine going through (except nate fisher). wonder why its not more popular than it is. maybe because nancy travis was in it. i think i'll have to hunt down the original to compare. remember having to turn on computers from a switch on the back? and here we go with the nosey girlfriend. and who wouldn't choose sandi over nancy??? give the guy a break. the ending was kinda bad. sandra gets totally screwed in the movie. not in the good way. don't see. had a lot of potential going into the end. oh well.
my little bro is in town so he and i went shooting today. we had a really good time just him and i. lately i've been really thinking about the relationships i have with all my siblings. chris and i being the farthest from me, have a different relationship than joe and i. and even though i'm right in the middle of the two, its tough because i'm more in an adulthood where joe is. this isn't at all to say that i don't love the kid just as much as anyone else. we just all relate different. was looking at my sister's closet with all her pics and there are so many with her and chris when they were so young. i never realized that i guess they are closer to each other as far as having that "bond" than probably anyone else. i relate of course most to joe but its pretty sad to think about how much him and i missed of each other growing up. we were always apart for almost as far as i can remember and never became really close friends until so late in life. and even now it almost seems like we really don't know all those things about each other that bros should know. most of this is because we live too far apart so every six months when we see each other its all just about playing catch up and always having to do stuff and not just like me coming over to hang. the shitty part about this is that we freaking lived together for a while and lived like 25 minutes away but for some idiotic reason i didn't do anything with him. i've tried to think back and remember why we never bonded but i can't think why i wouldn't. a ton of my time i know went to girls and what not, but still. guess i just gotta blame it on high school. everything seems to be going to hell right now with my family. grandpa and ruth and larry all just falling apart. and greg trying to be all sweet to me right now and be my friend. i hate him to no end but then its so hard to be angry at him when he's like that. i don't want to give in and allow things to be civil between us. so i think i'll take his gift he got me from tijuana and still hate him.
remember qwest and all the people. i knew an entire other universe that only a select few knew and now its just gone. anders was such a good person. how i miss him dearly. i’m not gonna sit and go through everyone, but there are a few just to make mention of. matt, my dear matty. we are all tired of me praising that unique soul. kristen cooper, all the peggys and that anorexic witch rhonda, ms. truckey, darnell, and joe chambers. the god of our universe and what a caring man. he and i had a relationship somewhere between acquaintance and friend. here is this upper 40’s man, director of hundreds of people, and yet somehow he and i both saw personally each other at our best and worst. now i see his face in my head and its hard to believe that i even knew that person. but he was a father like figure i won’t ever forget. especially since tom, only god knows why, remembers that joe was my boss and reminds me as many times as he can remember. and joni morse. my little friend next door. she was a slacker like i was, but was just better at smoozing her way out of it. she was a good honest friend to me and i really hope she has found what she was looking for, which now that i think about it, i know what it would be. and george, the girl george. and rich who saw through me every second i was there. kenny was a different sort. if there ever was such a thing as the swiss acting devious, kenny would be the leader. but he was that person who would find out first about all my random doings from summer 01. ron, sometimes naïve, other times sharp as a nail. my dear boss cindy. how i let her down. michelle, amber, michael thiel, ron newton, elaine, the neo-nazi village people lookin queer. kristen dawn johnson is complicated. vivian is complicated. paul smith and jan danziger. i was nothing without her lack of care about her job. there are so many, many more. even throw in the good old boys like sol, joe, and that one middle eastern guy who was naccio’s own consigliere. this was a sometimes wonderful world and sometimes more than i could handle. i’ve learned so much from this place. i think back about what might have been there. could have got fired because: 1. they were always firing peeps left and right when i was there; 2. i was a slacker who stopped working at some point in the fall; 3. the project management was the only team we could see affording to lose a person; 4. would have been just my luck. but then again, as a cruel, cruel joke on my sad life, with my luck, had i stayed with them, i might have gotten a better job with them. ron howard was leaving the mailbox manager position to move up the chain and take over his old boss’s (karen) position. once he came to me and whispered that he was going to recommend that i take over his job supervising the mailbox building aspect of voice messaging and being over like 20 something employees. i’ve always been able to scam my way to the top one way or another, but i generally never get too high up in the world. this would have been beyond anything and i wonder if someone like me should actually deserve to take on that privilege. this is the kind of job that gets you noticed and from there on out i would seriously be on a continual climb upward. most jobs don’t get such an opportunity. he was sad to find out that i was planning to leave the company. i hate thinking that this was a possibility. i sometimes try and think really hard back to that time for maybe reasons that would have come up to prevent me from moving up. i don’t see why i couldn’t though. i think kenny ended up getting it so at least i’m glad for that. or did joni get it? and granted, these are just the people in the universe. there was so much more that was part of this life. the travels, lunches, cubicles, rules, elevators, floors, views, drama. it was something else.
No comments:
Post a Comment